Tag: coming of age

Baseball?

Baseball?

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Starting pitcher Luke has a lot on his mind lately now that the formerly straight athlete has found himself in a relationship with another guy, and really enjoying that relationship. A lot of people are wondering what this means for Luke. Is he gay or straight? Are there other options? Fortunately, he can take his mind off all that during a baseball game. Until, like a good boyfriend, his boyfriend shows up to cheer him on.

This scene is from One Little Lie, where a clueless jock learns the world is more than just gay or straight in this coming of age love story about secret relationships, friendship, and bisexuality.

~

Luke

I LOVE BASEBALL. ESPECIALLY DURING GAME TIME. Worried thoughts about my personal life weren’t important when playing ball. On the mound with all eyes on me, I felt great. People watched me because I excelled at this, not because of who I was dating.

The game started and I was in the zone. My whole focus was on the game.

Until Ryan. My stupidly distracting boyfriend.

As a likable athlete, I had few embarrassing moments until Ryan walked into my life. Still, what was lacking in quantity was now made up in quality.

Due to the nice day, Ryan wore a tank top and shorts. He looked innocent enough, plus so freaking tall. Grab a ruler and check if I lied, there were miles and miles of his long legs on display. So much skin, how were his legs so shapely and toned? Running, he claimed, even though I’d only seen him run his mouth.

Ryan sat on the bleachers, not being embarrassing for once. I embarrassed myself, unable to keep my gaze away. Dammit! I ogled my boyfriend instead of pitching. He saw me looking and waved. I waved back before remembering I should pay attention to the game. The runner at first advanced to second and I heard distant yelling from my coach.

Shit. Taking a moment, I refocused my attention. Time to strike this batter out. I lined up the pitch, got ready, and…

My eyes drifted back to Ryan.

–Grab the book here as part of the One Crazy Love Story box set, which features the first four books in the One More Thing series of contemporary YA novels.

Worst Superpowers Ever

Worst Superpowers Ever

by fnmanning ♥ 1 Comment

I love those superpowers that are barely superpowers or that are so mediocre it’s like, come on, universe, why even waste time bestowing that gift? Surely there’s more important tasks you could spend time on. What springs to mind for examples are:

  • Moist from Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, who slightly wettens things
  • The main character from Treasured who can look a few seconds into the future, even though waiting a few seconds achieves the same thing. (You can check out my review for this book here!)
  • The Invisible Boy who can only turn invisible if people aren’t watching him from Mystery Men. (sorry because this reference is practically ancient by now.)

In general, invisibility seems like one of the worst, least wished for superpowers ever. And when John Hyde stops feeling overlooked and becomes literally overlooked while turning invisible, he’s stumbled onto one of those ‘meh’ superpowers in my Vella novel Invisi-bi-lity.

Mostly, invisibility is good for spying on people. Which is extreme nosiness, bordering on creepy voyeurism. If you wanted to rob banks or commit crimes, your face wouldn’t show up on cameras. But then we’re entering criminal territory and I’d imagine you’d still need skill at criming to get very far.

Questionable superpowers are only the start of John’s problems in the novel. He’s also having trouble coming out as bisexual because some of his friends think being bi doesn’t really exist. He’s talking to his sympathetic friend Sky in this scene.

~

“When people wanna overrule who another person is, I’m a little sensitive to it. Who has the right to dictate someone else’s truth?”

Somewhat comforting words. Except why didn’t she speak up in there?

“Look, I should be a braver person.” She sighs. “But I don’t wanna rock the boat. It’s a lonely thing, isn’t it?”

“What?”

“To be among your own people and still not understood.” From her knowing stare and the sad little smile on her face, I almost wish she couldn’t see me.

Vitality

Vitality

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Hello, I wish to talk about my Kindle Vella novel, Invisi-bi-lity, but I’m not sure what to say. I had one image quote and post to make without having a plan for the content. This is always a dangerous situation, so let’s start with the easy stuff.

Description: John Hyde often feels overlooked. Even his best friend Cody doesn’t truly see him or that his feelings have changed from friendly to romantic. So he’s wondered before if anyone would notice if he disappeared, but he never thought he’d find out until he literally turns invisible. Is this the world’s worst superpower, a hex from a vengeful witch, or has bisexual erasure taken on new meaning? Whatever’s going on, if John can’t make himself seen soon he’ll vanish forever.

Hooray, I have now thought of either a terrible or perfect segue for the scene I’m sharing: in my novel, Cody and John go together like five ‘i’s in ‘invisibility.’ It’s vital! Yes, I admit this metaphor isn’t very catchy. (If you’re wondering what I’m talking about, check out this post about my titling woes for Invisi-bi-lity.)

In this scene, Cody tells John about his vitalness to Cody’s life. John is freaking out because he’s invisible for some reason?

~

I’d give anything to throw open the door and reassure Cody, but what will he find waiting on the other side? I’m afraid to look in the mirror again. There’s no way I’m invisible and yet… Whatever’s happening, I’m starting to believe the impossible. It’s terrifying.

 “What’s going on?” Cody asks quietly.

“Do you ever feel like you don’t exist? Do you worry nobody would notice if you were gone?”

“I’d notice,” he answers fiercely and immediately. “I would notice and I’m so glad you’re here. Don’t ever think of going anywhere.”

“I won’t,” I prom—say, because unfortunately, that might not be a promise I can keep right now.

“Besides,” Cody says. “How can I be myself without you in my life?”

Rising up with shaky legs, my head peeks over the bathroom counter—oh thank god. There I am.

After opening the door, I’m not sure who moves into who, but we wrap our arms around each other and don’t move for a long time. Things seem normal again. Normal enough. Feeling his burgundy wool sweater between my fingers makes me hold on tighter. In Cody’s arms, everything will be okay.

-Read more here!

Relationship Expert

Relationship Expert

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Ryan Miller may be a science genius, but his relationship skills are put to the test when his boyfriend struggles to ditch his beard and come out of the closet in the coming of age love story One Little Lie. In this scene, Ryan uses his questionable expertise to figure out whether he’s about to go on his first double date. He is contractually obligated to freak out for all big moments like this. The contract is his life.

~

Ryan

“Why aren’t you more worked up? This is our first double date.”

The words first and date so close together made my heart speed up in anxiety. Ryan’s didn’t do well under pressure. Hey, wait. I pointed a finger at Luke. “I see what you’re doing.”

Instead of giving me his clueless, earnest gaze, he smirked. My boyfriend was secretly evil! I’d be upset about it, but it was a little hot.

“Is it working?” he asked hopefully.

“Why do you want me to be a nervous wreck like you?” I asked with a pout.

His smirk only intensified. “You’re fun when you’re a nervous wreck.”

“It’s not going to work,” I said haughtily. I did the teasing to Luke. It didn’t work the other way around!

Evil boyfriend continued to smirk. Had we ever been on a double date before? Oh, mother fu-

Wait! “No, we went to dinner with the girls earlier,” I realized triumphantly. I already defeated my first double date. Or a word less combative.

He frowned for a moment, then shook his head. “No, that doesn’t count.”

“You can’t decide that,” I decided. “Who made you the decider of all things?”

Relationships weren’t dictatorships! They were about give and take. God, I was one of those people who acted like an expert anytime I was in a serious relationship. I hated those people. Except when those people were me. Maybe I really was an expert.

Wait, I totally wouldn’t mind if we had a dick-tatorship…

-This is from One Little Lie, the second sweet and snarky M/M romance in the One More Thing series of contemporary YA novels. Grab the book here as part of the One Crazy Love Story box set, which features the first four books in the One More Thing Series.

Trick Questions?

Trick Questions?

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

A 16-year old boy in a boring city ponders his place in the universe in my coming-of-age novel Invisi-bi-lity. Or at least he wonders about the important things in his universe. Namely, who he is and who he loves. John has some ideas but isn’t totally sure. He could be bi or he might just love one guy, his best friend Cody.

This seemed like a good place to start the novel, right when he’s figuring out the answers to some big questions he’s been wondering about for a while. Of course, the answers won’t slap him on the face but Cody does. He snaps him out of his daydreaming, they do some illicit activities together, and John has an epiphany.

Cody and John talk about birthday wishes in this scene, and John has a realization.

(It’s extremely possible these realizations will be a lot less shocking to you than they are to John.)

~

When we emerge on his grandparent’s front lawn, Cody makes an excited noise. “Hey, don’t I get a wish for birthdays?”

“You get a wish for your birthday, not my—”

“Too bad,” he talks over me. “I already know what I’m asking for.”

A billion dollars or a new car? Ending world hunger? A date with that gay YouTuber he always says is cute?

Cody smiles, lit by his grandparent’s porch light. “I wish that this is the year you finally realize how amazing you are.”

Suddenly I feel completely sober.

Once, my feelings and the labels that best define me seemed confusing. These days, the real issue comes from my readiness to acknowledge these inner truths. Maybe I’m just looking for a sign, a push, for the truth to slap me in the face until I can’t ignore it anymore.

The sincerity in Cody’s voice, how his lopsided smile looked so bright even in the dark… there’s another option to my life-long romantic questions. Why hadn’t I considered it before? I’ve been trying to decide whether I’m bi or in love with my best friend, but the answer seems so clear on the walk home. It’s both. I am bi and I love my best friend.

-check it out on Vella here!

Myths and Legends?

Myths and Legends?

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

To be honest, I have absolutely no clue how I came up with the idea for Invisi-bi-lity. Because it happened so long ago. This was a story I first had the idea for when I started the F.N. Manning pen name, which feels like a million years ago. It was at least three. In fact, as I’m writing this, it occurs to me I had a document with notes and ideas that I always planned to consult when writing this and… I totally forgot.

Anyway…

Our hero John is an overlooked 16-year-old in Buffalo, New York. His quest to come out as bi and confess his love for his best friend becomes infinitely more complicated when he starts disappearing from view.

In this scene, John’s taking a break from a game night with friends. He’s on the verge of telling people he’s bi but apparently some people don’t believe this is a real thing. He has a reaction to this he isn’t expecting.

~

“Bisexuality is what people say while they come out. Not something that actually exists.”

“Uh. Wha—”

My pulse suddenly pounds loudly in my ears. Everything seems to happen in slow motion.

“Of course you were fooled,” Dennis says. “People still search for the Loch Ness Monster or Big Foot. Myths are fascinating, and everybody wants to be the hero who proves the legends true, but it’s just not possible.”

“I’m gonna take a break,” I say.

I walk down a narrow hallway without seeing anything until I find the bathroom. One stupid comment, one opinion, it shouldn’t bother me so much. It shouldn’t. But that doesn’t stop the pain, the shame as if I did something wrong, I’m not enough…

Intending to splash cool water on my face and snap out of it, I flip on the lights and face the sink. Standing right in front of the mirror, the sight there sends me reeling all over again. I look in the mirror and nobody stares back at me. There’s nobody there.

Invisi-bi-lity: New YA M/M Romance!

Invisi-bi-lity: New YA M/M Romance!

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

My newest novel is up on Kindle Vella right now!

When a teen’s attempts to come out of the closet are influenced by a vengeful witch’s hex, bisexual erasure takes on a whole new meaning in Invisi-bi-lity.

Vella is a new way for authors to post stories on Amazon, and it works in episodic format. An author I follow had this plan, probably much more thought out than my own, to have five stories published by the new year. Pretty ambitious, considering they possibly wanted the novels to be complete too. For some reason I thought I could do the same thing, so I guess I’ll look on the bright side and praise my confidence.

I have three works currently on Vella and one soon to be published. Of these four, two are finished. So I actually didn’t do too bad and am going to give myself an A for effort. I tried and I tell myself that’s the important part.

Here is a scene from the beginning of the book. The main character John has some trouble pinning down his sexuality because a certain boy always gets in the way.

~

Figuring out my sexuality is difficult enough without Cody O’Keefe screwing everything up.

The high school halls are filled with attractive people. From the cute girl with amazing legs in my English class to the washboard abs of the football quarterback. Then Cody smiles at me, his eyes crinkling at the corners, and I only see him.

Intelligent, funny, and gorgeous, Cody O’Keefe has it all. My favorite thing about him? When people talk, he listens. He makes people feel important. It’s basically a superpower in a boring city where nothing ever happens like Buffalo, New York… though his warm brown eyes are also nice.

Cody’s gay. And he always knew. Back in kindergarten, he told his parents he’d rather marry me than Ella Hopkins and no amount of her sharing Rice Krispy treats would change that. Girls? Not gonna happen.

Me? I’ve sometimes been pretty sure I may not be straight. Occasionally. Much less definitive.

Sometimes I think I’m not bisexual, I’m just a little in love with my best friend. Or am I bi but only fixating on the nearest and best queer guy and not really in love with him? These questions swirl in my brain constantly these days. How do I gain clarity? The answers won’t just slap me in the face with the truth.

“Ah!”

Tuning back into the world around me, I stand on the sidewalk, staring incredulously at the guy who just slapped me in the face.

“Sorry, did I hit too hard?” Cody pats my cheek this time, an affectionate sort of slap. “My bad, but you were pretty far away.”

About a head taller, he stands there with an easy smile, all up in my business without the slightest hesitation. Comfortable in our friendship and totally unaware of the thirsty thoughts in my brain.

Cody O’Keefe has amazingly soft chocolate-brown hair that gets mussed if you so much as look at it wrong. With peach skin and the most enticing slightly chubby cheeks, his beautifully open face is nearly as expressive as the song lyrics, affirmations, and notes he always writes on his arms in black or blue pen.

-check out the rest of the novel here on Vella!

Shameless Flirting

Shameless Flirting

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

In One Little Lie, a clueless athlete learns the world is more than just gay or straight in this coming of age love story about secret relationships, friendship, and bisexuality. This scene involves two boyfriends snarking at each other before they go out for the night. I don’t believe more context is necessary, this is mostly shameless flirting.

Oh, expect some helpful information to know is that One Little Lie is on sale. Get a discount now by grabbing the book for 99 cents while you still can! This is the second sweet and snarky M/M romance in the One More Thing series of contemporary YA novels.

~

Luke

“Wait, your parents weren’t home?” Ryan asked. “Shoulda mentioned that earlier, Chambers.”

I had no idea. Also, I blamed him. “You’re supposed to be the smart one, Miller.”

Ryan squawked in outrage. “Sorry, I was distracted by someone trying to pick out the right nail polish and dress to wear.”

“Are you implying I wear a dress because I’m gay?” I managed not to add an ‘or something’ on the end and ruin the joke. I continued with, “That’s homophobic and I’m offended.”

Ryan rolled his eyes. “Don’t even try that with me.”

“I’ll do what I want with you,” I muttered darkly, moving into his personal space.

He batted his lashes at me. “Promises, promises.”

–You can also grab the book here as part of the One Crazy Love Story Boxset, which features the first four books in the One More Thing Series.

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

What seemed closer to a vast ocean as a child is actually a tiny oasis of blue and green serenity where water plants thrive. The greenish dark water and picturesque lily pads on top spark a rush of nostalgia. I remember the satisfying splash of chucking a bottle in there.

As kids, we were creative since we lacked glass bottles. Instead, we used old prescription bottles from our parents to deliver our notes. The little orange capsules stuck out, orange buoys signaling a secret message from friends.

–The Boy Next Door

A picture is worth…

A picture is worth…

by fnmanning ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

No matter how many times I paint the feelings, he doesn’t understand. The canvas displays the buttery yellow curtains of his room, the wide-open window and all the hope there painted in shades of pink and possibilities, but he never understands my message. He never hears my love for him.

The Boy Next Door